Shoot Me As I Go On and On
Jesus Christ. Life sucks so bad….
So as.mentioned before, last night on the way home from rehersal which sucked so bad for me, found out my aunt passed away… And my mom is feeling.depressed. there’s so much I could blab out but the only way to put it is that its gone… You cry and cry about it but nothing happens. I honestly think no one but my friend Amer cares. I wish I could live happily for her. But I can’t. I just can’t be happy.
I feel emotionally unstable and I try my best to lock it away from the public eye and everyone probably things I’m “hiding” things for attention.
I swear in all honest to god, I do not want to live on this planet anymore. Where you lose people you love, someone breaks your heart and fucks with it, family that dosent genuinely like me. I feel like my world’s been crashing from day 1. Just shoot me in the brain and get it over with.
And I know… I know I’ve said this a million times but its true; I wish the first time I tried to kill myself worked.
Just to end this insanity racking in my brain thats killing me inside. It’s like my soul was taken away, beaten, bruised up, stabbed and pushed it back into my ugly body. I just can’t…. I can’t do this anymore.
I remember when I tried to kill myself the second time and I called the suicide hotline.. and I talked and talked and after I just passed out. Then the third time, the same person answered the hotline and talked to me. I wish I could meet her. Her name was Hannah. She was so darling and lovely. The world needs more people.like her. But unfortunately. Life sucks and people suck and they just want to ruin your life to the point where you commit suicide and it actually works.
